My pride, my sanity, my everything
by TheOnceAnonymous14
Summary: Jackson has had many thoughts which revolved around Melissa, here are some of the many.


**So this is something that came to mind if you remember hotel tango when they heard a noise Mel ran to Jackson here is what I think Jackson thought and some extra thoughts from moments in the island.**

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**A noise caught us by surprise, even myself for a second. But what I won't forget is how that noise brought me much more closer to Melissa. She has always been there for me even when there were times I didn't want her to be near me. But now that I think about it she has always been the one keeping me sane as long as I had been on this island. That one moment when that noise happened stuck out the most.

She ran to me. She ran to me because she trusted I would protect her. She believed in me, and thought that I would keep her safe. Which no matter what I would have done. She was the reason I was here and I felt the need to protect her. I haven't had this feeling in a long time. I can't place what it is yet, love, trust, faith whatever it was it's taken over me when I am near or thinking of her.

When she hid behind me I couldn't help but feel a bit of pride and cockiness. I can't help it; I am a guy these feelings come naturally. It was also amusing too, hiding behind the 'bad boy'. But I still made sure I came across as the guy they needed, the guy _she_ needed. I toughened up and went to check around to see who was there.

**Later on in the day Jackson is by himself is reminiscing about Melissa.**

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**Man oh man I keep thinking back to all the moments I acted jealous without anyone knowing. Melissa keeping Nathan's secret about his feelings for Daley was one moment where I thought for a second, my everything was no longer mine. Well she never was but everyone knew she would be. How I accused her of having an attraction towards Nathan since she was in all the scenes. I am glad though that no one realized my tone of jelousy due to the serious events at the time.

Thinking about when I should have defended her properly was another thought that popped to mind. Like the time Nathan went all out on Mel because she screwed up the matches. I wanted to strangle him but no one knew me well enough and I didn't want to screw things up even more. But then again the look of joy on her face when I helped find a solution was the cherry on the cake that day. Her smile could light up the world.

Seeing her hurt always killed bits of me. All the pain started when Taylor and I got closer. Taylor always seemed predictable but seeing her in a different light was interesting. She began to seem more normal and someone who actually had some brains. I couldn't help but talk to her more; she was more like a good friend rather than girlfriend. There were times where I compared her to Mel, but I knew that she was nothing. So why wasn't I able to tell Mel that right away when she asked me what was going on with her? Being caught up with the shock that my Mel would ask me so harshly and look with her disappointed and hurt eyes just caught me off guard.

Thankfully I stumbled out to her it was her that was always the one. Once I had explained my side of the story I think she finally understood that we were stuck on an island, supplies were running out and we had to focus on that and not who likes whom. Someone has to keep everyone focused, and in tact, for if everyone thought like Eric what progress would we have made?

Whatever said and done my feelings for Mel grew within the days of being with her, the main reason why I even cracked and want to leave is to be with her and give the call I promised. When it comes to her I want to be a man of my word. She brings this side of me which I never knew existed but I've maintained a sense of coolness to make sure no one really knew. I guess some would say I love her.

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**HUGE THANK YOU for XoxMountainGirlxoX who helped me tremendously with editing my work. If it weren't for you I wouldn't have felt comfortable in actually posting this! Also RobertDowneyJrLove you are becoming one of my closest friends on fanfic. It's 12:20 am so I am going to post this out and catch some sleep! Thank you to all the people who review, I will definitely give you all recognition some how for your reviews!**

**If you guys have any suggestions as to what I should have Jackson think more about or just ideas let me know and I will get back to you whether you are anonymous or not. I will get back to Melissa's Thoughts it has been busy and I am sort of stuck remember I am more than willing to have suggestions on upcoming ideas or chapters.**


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